this is why you’re miserable


When Droopy was little, he would sometimes utter the most amazing words of wisdom. Like the time we were in the checkout line at the grocery store and he noticed a magazine cover with a blonde running down the beach. She was Pamela Anderson, the Baywatch babe. He pointed and spoke.


I smiled and crooned, Good boy. If I really looked, I could also see the likeness, such a wise boy and not even 2.

Another time we had pulled into the driveway alongside muddy tire treads through the grass. Chris had gotten a tractor trailer stuck. I won’t even go there, I still have nightmares! 18 month old Drew observed the mess and spoke.

“Who the hell made ‘dis mess?”  

This one shocked me. We actually believed swearing could send you to hell so those weren’t words he heard very often. Except every Sunday sermon. And when Chris got tractor trailers stuck in the mud. Drew wasn’t finished.

“Chucks ‘long in the toy box!”

Yes , Son, they do. But things and people are not always where they belong. You will learn this.

One time I was dressed up and had my hair in a special updo. No one noticed but Drew.

“You look ravishing, Mama!” The little man wasn’t yet two. And I felt 18 again.

One day, 2-year old Andrew was playing barbies with Jessica. Matt always refused to play. Maybe because it was dolls. Probably because Jess had to be in charge and control every single absolute minute detail of the play. Drew was so good natured, he could pretty much overlook anything and have a good time.

Today Jess was dressing the barbies for the beach. Just like every other day. Droop piped up, “Can we build a snowman today?”  He wanted it to be winter for once. He kept fingering the miniature fur coats and long lace-up boots.

“No! The snow is messy and cold!” Jessica continued to pull the teensie tiny bikinis over the miniature barbie hips.

Drew loved every day, and this included snowy, messy, cold winter days.

“You can make snowmans and snowballs and snow forts in the snow!”  He was insistent.

“Winter is cold and yucky!”

“Winter’s ravishing!!!” Drew’s word for beautiful.

“Winter is ugly!” 


Drew NEVER caused a fuss. And I mean NEVER. I used to joke that Drew was as much work as a teddy bear. At 10 months old he’d be sitting playing with his blocks and when he got tired, he’d tip himself over and have a nap! Sometimes he would sleep for two hours while I vacuumed around him! He wouldn’t make a sound when he awoke, just shake his wee legs and arms in excitement until I noticed and tipped him upright!

But today, the little teddy bear was determined to have his way. He stood up, fists planted firmly on his hips and spoke. very loudly.

“THIS IS WHY YOU’RE MIZABLE!!!” And stomped away.


We were all shocked. I’d have been less surprised if Mona Lisa had stuck out her tongue when Bonnie and I had stared underwhelmed at her painted form.

Droopy was taking a stand! And it was a good thing. Jess was so shocked she agreed to play winter with the barbies. Matt was so shocked he agreed to play barbies, a first for him. I was so shocked I stopped cleaning and made hot chocolate and homemade chocolate chip cookies to warm JAM and the barbies when they came in from the snow.

And we all enjoyed a beautiful winter day in the middle of July.

On mizable days, and there seem to be more with this season of menopause, I remember the little teddy bear who insisted that every day is beautiful. I find the beautiful and focus on that. AND IT’S A CONSCIOUS EFFORT, PEOPLE! Just like I consciously go for a run, I consciously eat healthy foods, I consciously clean my house (sometimes!), do my homework, take a shower (most days!), walk the dog and on and on through life I go. 

Consciously finding the ravishing in every day. And this just makes it all a little more bearably beautiful.

ps. I have to admit, you guys, being the hot blonde that I am certainly helps! Wow. I love that kid 🙂








3 thoughts on “this is why you’re miserable

  1. I swore I wouldn’t mention this first. I lied. Your boys are beyond adorable in that picture! I love Drew’s attitude that there’s something ravishing in every day. Even the darkest days have some tiny glimmer of light and it’s incredible that he was able to recognize it so early in life. I hope he’s the same today. He inspired me!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Drew is even more like this! I call him my guru…has always been wise beyond his years. Love in human form, my Drew. And thanks! I think my boys are adorable…they were born 3 minutes apart, and will be 24 soon! Love them both dearly!


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