right turns

Even in a blind taste test most would easily pick the lemon from a bowl of fruit. This sour citrus fruit has a decidedly unique taste that sets it apart from peaches and apples. Most of us can’t bite into a lemon without making a scene! Have you ever watched a baby eating a lemon?! The bitterness is simply unbearable. It’s actually a built-in survival technique from days long ago designed to prevent us from consuming inedible poisonous or rotten plants. Cause they could kill us!

Bitter pretty much tastes the same in humans as in lemons. Bitter people, more commonly referred to as toxic, are quite easy to pinpoint.

The quickest needle you’ll ever find in a haystack.

And they will kill you – at least your spirit – if you have too big a helping.

Here’s the kicker: adding bitter ingredients can actually up the ante in a delicious meal! In other words- make it better! That goes for us humans too! Bitterness follows unwanted experiences. People aren’t born bitter, but life and its happenings can leave us with a sour outlook. Unfortunately, not one of us can escape a little misfortune; some face unbelievable odds. Some of us are better because of it.

Last week someone called me bitter. No, I need to say that with passion! LAST WEEK SOMEONE CALLED ME BITTER! Not good enough. LAST WEEK SOMEONE CALLED ME BITTER! ok that’s better.

Now I know I’m not bitter. But I also know, statistically speaking, I probably should be. And the people who called me bitter also know that I have every right to be. But I’m not. I’ve always instinctively known that bitterness would only destroy me. You’ve heard the old parable Harbouring resentment is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die.

Yet here I was letting thieves into my house, stealing my joy. So I went for a run and figured it out. And I realized they were confusing anger and bitterness. And to be honest, they weren’t confused at all. Remember The Bite Fight? When Tyson decided he’d rather be disqualified than knocked out by Holyfield? So he bit Holyfield’s ear clean off?! Holyfield, the underdog, was winning; and Tyson, simply, was a sore loser. 

Years ago after some very traumatic events, to save my life, I went to a psychologist. He was a Christian man who went to church every Sunday. And he was the first person to tell me about spiritual abuse. And anger. He said Jesus was perfect; yet, he got angry! He said anger, the healthy kind, protects me and keeps thieves away from my house. I thought it was pretty darn cool that a ‘representative of spirituality’ was saying, GET MAD!

I was 47, and I realized I had never been angry. And it had caused me a lot of pain.

Nope. I’m not bitter.

Just angry.

That cancer is taking so many lives. I was one of the lucky ones. Check your boobs! DON’T LET CANCER CREEP UP ON YOU! BE HEALTHY! FIGHT BACK! ‘Feel yourself up’ TODAY. cause tomorrow could be too late. Check out this website to make sure you’re doing it right! And if it invades anyhow, fight. like you never have before.

That marriages are more likely to fail than succeed. Mine did. TALK. SHARE. SPEND TIME. LISTEN. HELP. For heaven’s sake, have sex more than once a month. LAUGH. CRY. Yup, it’s what all the self-help books say, and it’s true. But if it’s over, have the courage to walk away. cause most times that’s harder than staying.

That churches can ex-communicate people for other people’s sins. or for sin at all. FIND A CHURCHor mosque or synagogue or temple or tabernacle or shrine for that matterTHAT CARES FOR YOUR SOUL AND NOT THEIR COFFERS OR SELFISH GAINS. no scapegoats needed. the Lamb of God will suffice.

That there is such a wide gap between the rich and the poor. That there are so many homeless. and abused. and hungry. That people don’t give a shit about one another.

that i say i’m angry but do nothing.

Listen, survivors! We’ve all waded through some murky waters. And mine are different than yours. But bitter is a waste of the rest of our lives. Instead, let’s get angry and use our stuff to help others. to warn them. and instruct. to support. and guide. to lift.

To say, “NO! TURN RIGHT! THE ROAD IS WASHED OUT AROUND THAT CORNER!”

But if it’s too late and the left turn is made, I’ll bring a boat, and row you in. safely to shore. 

and we will survive. all of us.

But there’s more! Do you know what counteracts the taste of bitter?! Honey or sugar! 

In human terms, that’s love.

Love … the right turn that will row us all safely to shore.

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